This is a cry for help.
It's been two weeks since Sofia came into our lives. Two fabulous wonderful weeks. She's an amazing baby and I can barely take my eyes off of her.
I love watching her sleep.
Her return tag has even fallen off so she's ours for good.
I have no idea how it got on my shirt though - am I gross for wanting to keep it?
Technically, her cloth diapers fit but they are comically bulky.
Looking so cute for Easter
What was I talking about?
Oh yeah! My boobs!
Y'all - I need help. I don't know how I did it but I got lopsided and it HURTS. The left one got the turbo switch and the right one is being all lazy, like 'Oh you got this? Cool, I'm going on break.' I don't know what to do! I read that you're supposed to favor the smaller one in an effort to get it up to the same speed as the turbo one, but I'm deathly afraid of plugged ducts and mastitis so I don't want to completely stop feeding on the turbo side. But holy my goodness, I'm so freakin full!
Not to mention I look ridiculous. I have one normal boob and one porn boob - I'm looking all kinds of hot with my unshowered, lopsided self! I was emailing with Rixa Freeze and she bets that our culture's preoccupation with porn boobs actually stems from that primeval appreciation for giant lactating breasts as our link to survival. I never thought of it that way and it makes perfect sense! Rixa Freeze is so smart.
I realize this post will probably only appeal to about four people, but that's where I am these days. Staring at my baby and wrestling with Turbo and Lazy. Riveting stuff y'all.
With my daughter I had the same thing- right was lazy, left was the producer! I always started her off on the right, and then let her finish on the left, and that helped a little, the the right one stepped it up a bit... but my left always outproduced my right. But after a month the HUGENESS wore off and they just looked like boobs again. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteGod, I hope so. I'm going to try pumping the right to see if it'll jumpstart things.
ReplyDeleteDefinitely put her more on the smaller side and then pump a little off the other side. Definitely. I used to rock lopsided boobs all the time. No biggie ;)
ReplyDeleteThe same thing happened to me! I totally feel your pain! But use the smaller one more than the other one and it should catch up to the other one. If not, rock the lopsided look with pride! I did for a little while. :) By the way, your daughter is gorgeous!!
ReplyDeleteShe is beautiful.
ReplyDeleteI have no advice about the lopsided-ness. But I just wanted to say I remember those commercials... and the ones where they hit their heads and make a wood sound??? haha
I had the same thing - my left was an over-producer and my right just couldn't keep up (and I have to say It didn't help that I could surf the internet when feeding him when he was on the left, but not the right). I didn't do anything about it and after I weaned - the left is WAY bigger still (and I won't even go into the fantastic new shape they have). So - DO SOMETHING. I keep hearing that when I feed my next one I can favor the right - but until then, I'm lopsided.
ReplyDeleteShut up are you serious?! I don't want to be lopsided forever! Crap!
ReplyDeleteI always have one that's a bit bigger. I was really lopsided after my first baby for a while. It's weird why one side will produce more than the other. But yes, just nurse a bit more on the "lazy" side than you do on the "overeager" side and otherwise don't worry about it. I wouldn't recommend pumping unless you want to boost your supply even more (which you might want to do if, for example, you want to build up a stash of frozen breastmilk). But yes, they will eventually settle down.
ReplyDeleteAnd that little wrinkly newborn skin on her back...to die for! I can't get enough of it because my baby is definitely not a newborn any more. I love watching babies sleep--how they smile and roll their eyes and pout and frown, all so fast you can hardly take it in.
what is it with the left!? have you noticed that everyone with the same phenom had a super charged left? I have the exact same thing going in and am trying all the things mentioned above. So far it has helped a bit, but the left is still my heavy hitter.
ReplyDeleteI have NO idea what to do about your boobies... but I will say that you have an AMAZINGLY ADORABLE baby. Just thought you should know. LOL
ReplyDeleteI so remember the commercial and caught the reference immediately!! (V8) And oh my goodness Sofia in her easter outfit is the cutest thing I've seen in 2011!
ReplyDeleteSorry I don't have any advice on the boobies :( But I will say Sofia looks SO freakin' adorable in her Easter dress & pink headband! She makes my heart melt...
ReplyDeleteOMG...She is absolutely, adorably GORGEOUS!!!! Congrats on that bundle of blessings!....Insert jealous moment here, because I've always been lopsided, lol. Whenever I was breastfeeding and had the extra noticeable lopsidedness, I just fed more on that side until they were even again. Worked for me. But with the youngest being 2 now, I'm still lopsided, lol.
ReplyDeleteI wonder if it has to do with what side you sleep on... I had the same, right bigger and more producing and left was sluggish in that area and I sleep better on my right side. I am probably just grasping at straws....lol
ReplyDeleteI would just do what the others said - keep her nursing more from the smaller one until they start to catch up. What I did was nurse from the smaller first, then the larger and then finished with the smaller one. Also, you can probably try some type of breast massages to stimulate production in that area. I've had someone have success in that.
All in due time. Your body will probably adjust but I think it is very common to be lopsided to some degree through nursing.
And Sofia is just a doll baby! :) Love her Easter dress. Hope you're getting enough sleep - you look well rested :)
She gets cuter and cuter everyday, the comical cloth diaper beyond adorable. Sorry no boobie advice, hope it gets better.
ReplyDeleteI think "misguided" boobs are normal. Mine snapped back after I stopped nursing.
ReplyDeletegirl that happened to me to. they were so hard and like rocks. i feel your pain...things get better. use ice packs. oh and i kept my kids ambilical cords when they fell off. am i gross?
ReplyDeleteI had the same issue and for the most part D only nurses from one side at a time. It wasn't such an issue when I was on leave because she ate so often that I could usually even things out. I didn't start pumping until she was 5 weeks old though - that's what the LC recommended. Anyway, things are a little better now and she'll sometimes nurse from each side now that she's bigger.
ReplyDeleteI have zero advice on the boobies, but I will say the first picture made me laugh out loud (in sympathy, of course!). Sofia looks so perfect in her Easter dress.
ReplyDeleteEveryones covered what I was gonna say... Pump girl.. but um...
ReplyDeleteyeah...
DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAMN!! LOL
xoxoxo
RO
Also- Ive never wanted to hold someones baby so bad! lol Aww she so cute!!
ReplyDeleteI realize that you feel lopsided and that it is probably glaringly obvious in the shower and naked in the mirror, but it doesn't jump out in the pictures and I really don't think anyone is going to notice it when you are just walking around on the street, so I wouldn't be self-conscious about it.
ReplyDelete!!! That first picture of Sofia! Such a beauty. I have nothing relevant about your boobs. I'm taking boob donations, so there's that.
ReplyDeleteGem
i remember those commercials!
ReplyDeleteyikes! nobody wants lopsided boobs. lol.
someone may have already mentioned this, but try cluster feeding on the lazy boob for a day or two and see how that works.
lol @ "return tag", but how in the heck did it get stuck to your shirt? a friend of mine accidentally ripped off her kid's cord stump when changing the diaper. lots of crying ensued, and not just from the baby. :)
p.s. love the picture of her with her little arm up behind her head.
I so love watching babies sleep too. I still watch jasmine sleep and snap pics of her. Ah, the swaddle use to be my BFF. And she has the same binks as Jas. 17 months later those things are still live savers for me(and her) and I loveee loveee the easter dress! And I still have jasmines cord the came off in a small plastic baggy. I guess I'm weird too lol
ReplyDeleteThe boobs, from what I understand you should try nursing on the gigantor side a little more. And also once you're done nursing they SHOULD go back to normal.
Smh@ MrsMaryMack for calling them Misguided boobs lmao!
Funny story time ~ Okay, so here's a question for ya: what do you do with lopsided boobies and you're not even a nursing mommy? HA! Yup, that's me. It's not obvious to anyone else but me and only when I wear long necklaces. Anyone want to guess at what happens when you wear long necklaces and your lopsided? Anyone? No. Lets just say that long necklaces seem to "frame" the smaller "boobie"! It's the most embarrassing thing ever to have your co-worker go, "It's doing it again; your necklace is framing your right boob"!
ReplyDeleteHope my little story was worth at least a chuckle. I may not have any advice on the "Porn boob vs. Normal boob", but like the others here, Sofia is absolutely beautiful. She is so angelic in her little Easter outfit.
As for the "return tag"...girl, you earned it, so you KEEP IT! Beautiful! So very happy for you and Drew!
Virna Lisa
For the lopsided boob action (not that we can really notice) my mom gave me a old wives remedy that worked for me with all 4 of mine: a warm compress on the lazy boob and massage. It will loosen the milk ducts and you won't have that rocks in the boob feel. It totally helped me.
ReplyDeleteP.S.
Sofia is absolutely ADORABLE! Almost makes me want another one... (I said almost)
Congrats mama!
That was so me!! While I breastfed my son - so not looking forward to the return of the lazy one, when this baby arrives in June
ReplyDeleteit appeals to me because you're f-ing hilarious!!! your boobs will go back to normal and your little lady looks so stinkin' cute in her easter dress!!!!!!!!!!
ReplyDeleteThe same thing happened to me! I totally feel your pain! But use the smaller one more than the other one and it should catch up to the other one. If not, rock the lopsided look with pride! I did for a little while. :) By the way, your daughter is gorgeous!!
ReplyDeleteWith my daughter I had the same thing- right was lazy, left was the producer! I always started her off on the right, and then let her finish on the left, and that helped a little, the the right one stepped it up a bit... but my left always outproduced my right. But after a month the HUGENESS wore off and they just looked like boobs again. Hang in there!
ReplyDeleteMy son has the same exact diaper cover and it is really bulky!
ReplyDelete